Apparently they have run out of questions on the John Howard Citizenship test which was applied today to new Australians in Victoria and Qld. See story here: http://www.abc.net.au/news/stories/2007/10/01/2047833.htm

John Howard has asked dinky di, true blue, died in the wool
Strayans on OLO to come up with some real curly ones that would weed out undesirables. (he does after all decide who comes to these shores)

Here are some of my own, can you help? We need at least 100 more

1) Who is the greatest PM to ever live?
2) What did those boat people do to their children on the Tampa?
3) Aborigines should have land rights, true or false.
4) This of the following people is not an Australian – John Smith or Akbar Hussien
5) Who is the greatest PM to ever serve?
6) Who is the greatest President of the USA?
7) Which Prime Minister of Australia has never lied to Australian people?
8) The current PM has kept interest rates low using brilliant economic policy. True or False.

I understand the questions are supposed to be multiple choice, so how about...

Q: Our national anthem states that we are young and "free". Does this mean:

a) businesses are free to pay employees the minimum they can get away with
b) businesses are free to force employees to work as many hours as they can get away with
b) businesses are free to emit as many greenhouse gases as they get away with
c) businesses are free to advertise their products to whatever markets they can suck in

d) all of the above?

Q1. Is it Illegal to lie to our parliament about WMD's?

a. Yes why not if you are a politician
b. Yes but pollies should do it discreetly
c. Yes and No depends on the issue
d. All of the above

Q2. Is it illegal under international Law to attack a country based on falsified information given to the UN?

a. No, Australia is so tough we can fight anyone we choose
b. No, but only when hiding behind the Yanks
c. No... because
d. Yes, someone arrest the PM

Q3. What is a refugee?

a. Anyone who the PM chooses to let into Australia
b. Anyone who can't be renamed as an illegal immigrant
c. Anyone who isn't of non christian background
d. Anyone running from a sadistic dictator whose country we help attack

Q4. When does a PM need to call an election

a. When the polls are just right for his party
b. When he has spent $200million on Govt advertising
c. When all the advertising begins to look like propoganda
d. When it suits him...

Q5. Should a PM break election promises?

a. Yes especially reinstating over generous superannuation for pollies
b. Yes when it's either a core and non-core promise
c. Yes when he lies about being able to control interest rates
d. No... Unless his name is John

Q6. Why should a PM include a fairness test in Work Choices.

a. He shouldn't if he can get away with it.
b. He shouldn't it's only little Aussies who will be hurt and they don't count
c. He shouldn't - Big business told him not to
d. He should but only after being dragged kicking and screaming to do it

BETTER QUESTIONS than the chicken poo ones on the actual list.

1/ Do you.. swear alleigance to Australia?
2/ Are you prepared to publiclally condemn any religion which permits child abuse, domestic violence, and abuse of captives ?
3/ Will you publically repudiate any verse from your holy book which suggests your religion has sovereignty over Australia ?
4/ Will you publically condemn the mistreatment and mutilation of prisoners
5/ Will you publically condemn the systematic murder of people who have surrendered ?
6/ Will you publically condemn Polygamy and child marriage ?

7/ Will you PUBLICALLY commit to defending Australia from ..and killing enemies from your own religion ?

Then..we might get somewhere :)

8/ Will you PUBLICLY commit to learning correct spelling?

Hey I'll publicly commit to defending my country from enemies from my own religion.

Boaz, under rule three, I'd like you to now officially declare that Australian law has precedence over any christian precepts.

Question: will you fight to the death for your new country if the world military climate suddenly changes and either Islam or China invades?

As usual, Gibo's on the mark: it's Military Climate Change that we should be worried about!

Some questions to judge your morality:

# Abortion should be/not be decriminalised because.....

# Euthanasia should be/not be legal because....

# Here's a line from our National Anthem:
"For those who've come across the seas
We've boundless plains to share"
Answer yes or no:
Should there be a small-print sunset clause added to these lyrics stating:
"This applies only after our refugees have been locked up in a detention centre for a few years while waiting for a visa."?

Australia doesn't actually have boundless plains to share.

Refugees and immigrants want to come here and they want to live near the cities, not on boundless plains, and they expect services and to access our welfare and benefits and to be permitted and supported to continue to live their own way.

We cannot just open our boarders to anybody who isn't happy in their own land as we cannot sustain it and there is also the risk of being taken over.

Things have definately changed.

TRTL... I hereby publically repudiate the idea of any kind of "Christian" sovereignty over Australia :) ie... that is based on any command.. or instruction in the Bible, such as related to 'government' of a country. There simply is none. We are told to obey and respect ALL and ANY government.. (unless it tells us to deny our faith.. deny Christ.. Worship other gods... etc)

However.. I do NOT repudiate the idea that in a democracy, if sufficient numbers of Christians exist, we can elect a government of our choice.. and to reflect the values that we cherish.

While the Almighty owns the cattle on a thousand hills.. (in fact every hill) and while we are told "All authority on heaven and earth is given to me (Christ)" the 'OUTCOME' of that Authority... is not 'government'...but conversion.. the proclamation of repentance, forgiveness, Salvation and becoming disciples of Christ in word and deed.

There 'could' be a "Christian" government of Australia.. and it could implement laws EVEN such as 'No Sunday trading' and while it had the political mandate to enforce this... all is well. When it lost that political democratic mandate.. it will fade and pass as all things do.

I would be interested to see the actual copy of the new citizenship test.

mmm maybe one question could be-

Is it ethical to let an Australian citizen to rot in a US jail indefinitely and only bring him home on election eve?

And another.

Was the intervention in the Northern Territory an ifringement on the human rigfhts of Indigenous pple- ?

I would like to know how many Australian school students could pass the citizenship students - perhaps even how many Australians?
While everyone is busy poking fun at it there may be some merit in acknowledging that migrants often seem to know more than the locals.

"Refugees and immigrants want to come here and they want to live near the cities, not on boundless plains, and they expect services and to access our welfare and benefits and to be permitted and supported to continue to live their own way."

Actually its been proven over and over again that refugees and immigrants tend to work their butts off when they arrive here. They, as a rule do not arrive just to go on the dole, instead they work to establish themselves and their families.

As a continuation of my previous post can someone please tell me how refugees and immigrants can be simultaneously dole bludgers and steal our jobs?

I've never worked that one out.

Question 33.

Refugees and immigrants are:

a) thieves
b) bludgers
c. Both a and b
d. What ever rednecks say they are.

I've gotta 'sit' this stupid fricken 'test' soon. What a waste of time.

It has questions on sport?. You're joking, right?.

Do you know
a)what vegemite is
b) what is it made from
c) the most common way to eat it

When is it more important to be recognised as an ethnic or Australian ?

Given the Commonwealth passes laws qualifying rights and or responsibilities of Australians on basis of race, when will the essential racial test required by Justice Dawson be available ?

Are the human rights of people on ethnic or Indigenous basis more or less important than basic human rights ?

IF exist any basic human rights, what are they ?

When is it more important to be recognised as an ethnic or Australian ?

An ethnic group or ethnicity is a population of human beings whose members identify with each other, either on the basis of a presumed common genealogy or ancestry[1] or recognition by others as a distinct group,[2] or by common cultural, linguistic, religious, or physical traits.http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Ethnic_group

Austrlain is a nationality, not an ethnicity, but i sense you think the two are the same. ie. Australian equals being white.(without ever defining what white is as an ethnic group)

Am I right?

Question 23 (a)

Who of the following people is not a real Australian

a) Shane Warne
b) John Howard
c) Paul Hogan
e) Daffy Duck

In Australia, homosexuals are:
a) stoned to death
b) have the exact same rights as heterosexuals
c) are being discriminated against

David, David, David.... What am I to do with you?

You typed "2/ Are you prepared to publiclally condemn any religion which permits child abuse, domestic violence, and abuse of captives?"

I take this from another thread we were debating -

Of course once you get into the Bible there are all manor of nasty little pieces hidden within it's volumes. Exodus 21 on slavery is a beauty for any Christian to ponder. What? Aussies can have a New Zealand slave(s? It approves selling daughters into slavery? - Hmmm what was God thinking? Jesus in Luke 12:47 says you can whip servants (slaves)... Wow what was Jesus thinking?

Now David please apply your question 2 to your chosen book the Bible. According to your reckoning and these two references alone YOU FAIL YOUR OWN TEST!

There should be no violence against any person, at any time, for any reason whatsoever, no oppression, no torture, no bullying etc. etc. - Now that is what I would have thought Christians should be saying!

And seeing The USA has used torture - Should we stop all Americans coming to our country. Not long back we had Georgey Bush here and he is the head of the USA and probably condoned the torture of detainees in the USA Govt's care. UnChristian - hey what?

Good luck with passing your question 2 David!

let's start with fundamentals:

1. what is a citizen?
a. a resident of a country
b. a resident of a country with a citizenship certificate.
c. a resident of a country empowered to vote for laws, policies,
and officers of state.

2. what is a democracy?
a. a nation called a democracy by it's politicians and academics,
and media.
b. a nation ruled by it's people.

3. is australia a democracy?
a. yes, everyone says so.
b. no, but no one cares because our masters are kind and
benevolent, working selflessly for our welfare.
c. no, but no one cares as long as football is free-to-air.

4. are you glad to be australian?
a. yes, we are girt by a wide sea, and far from trouble.
b. yes, although depending on desal plants for a drink seems a bit
chancy.
c. yes, our prime minister will look after us, he said so.

5. are you worried about the future?
a. nah, "she'll be right" has always worked before.
b. umm, the mortgage is killing us, and we spend more time
commuting than watching telly, so maybe a little worried.
c. the weather's gone feral, we can't afford to bathe every day,
and we're getting tidal surges at parramatta. but we're not
worried, the pollies say they have it under control. sort of.

Can't we conserve what we have already got? I think we are one of the few countries in the world we being born and breed in your own Country means next to nothing. Can the wannabe immigrants contribute more to our society or merely bring their staunch ways to our shores.

Our anthem should have been Maltzing Matilda, so I wonder if immigrants can they sing it or speak it or write it down or have a feel for this great country? That is what we seem to be afraid to ask. Are you to be a passionate Australian or just another number? This is a hot one.

Citizenship test

Question (1) Do you swear allegiance and unswerving loyalty to the
Australian people"
( Note that this is a different question to - Do you swear allegiance to Australia?) AUSTRALIA is the land and resources as opposed to the
Australian people. Of course they swear loyalty to the land because it is the fat of the land they come here for.
It is the land they covet and want.

(2)Should war break out between your old country and Australia for whatever reason do you swear to defend the Australian people from attacks from your old countrymen and not to take their side against your new countrymen.

(3) Would you have no objection to your children marrying an Australian who is not from your ethnic background.

If immigrants cannot answer yes truthfully and without hesitation to those 3 questions I believe their loyalty is in serious question and they should not be granted Australian citizenship.

I dont believe most immigrants could TRUTHFULLY swear to all of the above and it makes a complete mockery and nonsense of the swearing of allegiance ceremony. The whole thing is just a parroted farce.

QLDPCS,

On Waltzing Matilda, I've always had problems with that song being a national anthem.

I believe its about a man who had an intimate relationship with a sheep and who eventually drowns himself (suicides) in a billabong when the coppers discover him? What messages are we sending to our kids?

How about a citizenship question that asks new Australians to identify the latent erotic connotations in this song.

Ie,

Question 39. Which Australian song symbolizes ‘some’ Australians deep love of sheep as well a disturbing fixation with suicide.

1) Baa Baa Black Sheep
2) Mary had a little lamb
3) Waltzing Matilda

PS. Do you know what the coppers did with the sheep?

Sharkfrin,

I'd have to agree with you on Q3. I'd hate my beautiful 20 year old Indigenous daughter to marry a white Australian like you. I'd be more comfortable with a Muslim, European, Kiwi, Yank etcetera.