I've always been confused, by the promises made between two people who marry in the presence of God, in a church, exchanging vows and uttering the words "till death do us part"..all very romantic and in some cases, very painful.

Why exchange such nuptials and soon after, split and divorce, divide everything up (if married in community) and go their seperate ways, the vows long forgotten, as if never spoken.

Is this a sign of modern, stressful times?

'Is this a sign of modern, stressful times?' In actual fact never ghave we had so many comforts and so much wealth. Divorce is the fruit of hard hearts. The apostle Paul speaks of a time when men will be self-lovers, money-lovers, boasters, proud, blasphemers, disobedient to parents, unthankful, unholy,'

Often people don't keep their word these days so why should the vowels be any different. Thank God their is forgiveness for those who call on Jesus.

Probably more a sign of women now having more means to support themselves. Not been seen as the chattel of their husband etc. Women now have the means to exit a relationship if they want to/need to, rather than having to stay in a relationship in order to survive. I assume that the reverse also applies, men no longer feel that they have a lifelong obligation to support their wife, so if the relationship deteriorates to that point, why stay. That's aside from any obligation to support children of course.

I think pornography has a lot to do with it also. It gives men and women a false vision. Men thinking theres a better woman out there. Maybe also for the girls, thinking theres a better man. I wish John Howard had the grit to stand up and say, "porn is killing Australian society!"

I am one of the more cynacal people I know when it comes to seeing people marry nowadays. In my thoughts is 'how long will they last', 'do they really know one another to the extent to go through thick and think and grow old together'. I don't think there is enough maturity, especially with young people marrying. You haven't had time to get to know yourself as yet; it takes all of your twenties to really know who you are as an individual.

Yet I still believe in the institution. Whether the nuptials are exchanged in church or at a beach though is irrevalent to the outcome of the marriage if the couple haven't given time enough to plan their common goals. It involves knowing about finances, any children, goal setting, all Before marriage. There are rude shocks for many and especially those who find their darling partner doesn't want children.

Divorce IS occurring at an alarming rate. I heard the other day of a young couple getting engaged in August and to marry in December. I have not heard anything so absurd in all my days as I am taking about August as in last month! Is a rebound thing; the guy isn't concentrating on his fiance at all! Is a real concern, mentality like that.

For goodness sakes, marriage takes work and it takes a commitment through good times AND bad. I agree with an above post, individuals can self support now so no longer need to stay together. Example, staying for the sake of the children. Nowadays so many children are missing out and how sad that is for so many. Deprived of seeing grandparents, mum or dad; is a crime for hatefilled adults to impose that on the children who'll love each parent to death no matter what. No matter how slanderous the parents relate to one another and by the way, children witness and learn. Be careful what you say and do.

"Divorce is the fruit of hard hearts."

Hearts do nothing but pump blood Runner, didn't you know that?

Anthropologist Helen Fisher did alot of studying about the history
of marriage and what it basically comes down to is this:

Pairbonding (marriage as we call it) evolved in a number of
species, where large amounts of resources are required to
raise the offspring.

In humans, pairbonding for life really only became the norm
with the advent of agriculuture and the plow, when women
became completely dependant on men. Next they became
a possession and are still seen that way in many countries.
In Africa for instance, you buy a wife, pay lobola of
10 cows for her or whatever.

Given that women can now earn their own resources, they
are clearly not dependant on men anymore, as they used to
be, so have other options.

Personally I can't see the point in two people staying
together for life, if they clearly made a mistake and
aren't suited, or want different things from life.

We are all entitled to be happy and just because we
made a mistake at some point, does not mean that we
should be miserable for the rest of our lives.

So out of tradition and because they probably mean
it at the time, many couples do make commitments
for life, but things don't always pan out as
expected, things change