Felicity, it must be very tough. Being alone to face the relentless nature of care is too. And I the rejection by friends, family and society is hardest to bear. I imagine its not much fun for your son either.
I do have some other family and we get 3 hours of respite a week, but that is all. He has a cognitive impairment that effects behaviour and language and it is degenerative and will kill him. But I can't change any of that. I can only change my response - and that is what I am addressing. Railing against the world wont change a thing, but I have to deal with my own attitude first. One can love someone and still devalue and reject them. I have had to look at myself through all of this and deal with my own rejections and very conditional acceptance. Otherwise we expect from other people what we are unwilling to give ourselves. Projecting blame and exaggerating how hard it is does nothing to make our sons and daughters more appealing to others. We say others turn their backs, as we present them in the most negative ways. Huh? How is it working for you Felicity?

It is not worth having an open discussion with aqvarivs he obviously wants people to react to his ill informed opinions and narrow little world.

Keep the real debate going and give him a miss.

The fact is Australia should look after it's own.

The fact is there are 2.7 million carers out their and your voice is HUGE if you all learn to use it.

This political party is an excellent beginning, you all have nothing to lose and everything to gain.

If you can't get active, get noisy and make it LOUD.

The gun lobby can get people into parliament and they are few.

You are an enormous group of disadvantaged disaffected voters.

Believe me the powers that be will be watching very closely and if your party shows promise they will react.

The only thing they care about is their numbers and they won't want to lose to their seats to you.

Good luck!

Hi Dessert
How old is your child? Mine is 21 when he was born he was completely normal at 18mths he contracted meningitis and was left with severe brain damage and uncontrolled epilepsy.You talk about attitude,mine was optimistic I decided that we as a family would give him every opportunity to learn as much as possible[he learned to ski,swim,ride a bike and roller blade before he was 10]over the course of his life he has given me great joy and also great sorrow, as he got older his epilepsy took a toll and his abilities diminished and his violent behaviour increased, I think this was due to the drugs he has to take and the frustration he feels.I admire your attitude to your son and hope time will leave untouched

Aqvarivs, as a member of the Australian Defence Forces aren’t you and your family automatically entitled, by virtue of your paid employment, to any number of privileges/subsidies for health care ( including breast implants), dental care, accommodation, moving/ relocation costs, and access to Defence Force Welfare? Aren’t you also entitled to a pension that is far more generous than the general aged pension when you retire? Aren’t you entitled to compensation and support if you are injured in the course of your work – work that is responsible for more acquired disability in communities around the world than any natural event? Doesn’t all this largesse come from the Public purse? Surely you are aware that any insurance policy is voided by War, acts of God or terrorism.

Vietnam and Gulf War veterans have been fighting for decades for acknowledgement that their exposure to chemical and biological agents of warfare are potentially responsible for the very high disability rate in their offspring .

For unpaid family carers their home is their workplace 24 hours per day, 365 days/year, year in year out. If they receive any assistance in their care role in the home, they can be sued by any paid worker injured in the family home. Carers are not compensated for any injury they may receive performing their caring role, they cannot take time off when sick –substitute supports are extremely thin on the ground. For some family carers their homes are literally ongoing war zones. Carers are also expected to pay the extra costs associated with disability Family carers certainly are treated very differently and it is because they and their offspring are so neglected that they are speaking out, not as victims, not because they view their family member as a burden, but because the care role is made so onerous through the lack of community/government partnership in providing the needed supports.

70 years ago another soldier led a nation and the world to war based on a mantra of genetic purity and superiority – your comments would indicate that mankind hasn’t advanced too far since then

Thank you hells bells, you speak words of wisdom. Our 2.6 million caring families have far more important matters to discuss. Society will be judged not by how affluent or successful some sectors are, but by how well our most vulnerable citizens are cared for.

The reality for families caring for people with a dependent disability is that governments of all colours have refused to address the issue of discrimination against people with disabilities and the families who care for the most dependent of them.

Government bureaucracies and vested interests maintain the best place for such as these is with their families, at all costs, but what happens to them when their parents die of old age, or become users of aged care services themselves?

Carers groups were the only authors of submissions to the Senate Inquiry, with a detailed plan to introduce population-based benchmark funding to the CSTDA. The proposal asks for a benchmark of 18 beds or support packages per 1000 of the population aged 15 to 65. This is just 1.8 per cent of the target population of persons with a severe or profound disability. All governments are ignoring this sensible and just solution to the problem of the state, federal blame game.

Aged care has had such a formula for years for 108 beds or packages per 1000 of the population aged over 70, but the community is saying nothing about the 55,600 people aged over 34 years and still living with aged parents or the 700,000 others without any rights. Why are people with disabilities being so grossly discriminated against whilst the funded sector says nothing?

The pressure for both parents to be in the paid workforce means that unpaid carers are literally a dying breed. Make a difference people, use your vote to say NO to the exploitation of families as unpaid care labour and use your email to tell politicians you object to such treatment continuing.

scorpio, thanks for comparing all soldiers to Hitler and all science to the nazi's campaign for racial purity. What the soldiers in your scenario are asking for is that the government take responsibility for their collective actions. Soldiers don't declare war. Politicians do. Are you really that ignorant. Soldiers are no more responsible for war than policemen are responsible for crime. And don't make anywhere near the money or benefits package.

Good God. Are Australians really this fantastically stupid.

Before the emotives decided they had a 'right' to such mob mentality (and personal attacks) my point as stated, was that the 'reprieve' Jean was looking for would not come from an already over stress system of taxation. That it would only come from the advances in medical science, education, and proper decision making. As I said earlier. Much can be foretold in the womb today, that prenatal science is improving and that any potential impact there can be mitigated leaving the accident of disease to be dealt with. Medicine is advancing on disease and science and technology is helping with disabilities. We can use further education programmes, technology, and science to preclude many unwanted pregnancies, auto accidents, drunk drivers, drug addicts, a whole host of issues that negatively impact on our ability to answer each and every circumstance in every individuals life that eats away at the tax dollar. Freeing the already immense burden thus giving more money to the remaining social problems.

Me and the few remaining nazi scientist hope that DNA will be used as a tool to filter out even more potential problems and that heredity diseases and other genetic hiccups will be caught before more lives are restrained by physical and mental malformations. Though DNA will never be able to mitigate the numbers disabled through drug use and drunk driving. Ya can't fix stupid!