What I may or may not want is completely irrelevant to the point that talk of marriage between same sex couples is anathema to very many people who would otherwise support the idea of legal unions, with inheritance rights etc.
I avoid the use of 'Gay' as I know many people who are gay, most of the time, and who are strictly heterosexual, oft times that is one of the reasons that they are gay.
I've often had a gay old time myself, especially when dancing 'The Gay Gordons', and had an even gayer time afterwards.

Go for 'Civil Union' and much will be gained and nothing lost.

jpw2040,
You are obviously a concerned and thoughtful person, and I understand your disappointment, however, I wonder if you place too much importance on the word ‘marriage’. The Civil Union I envisage would confer all the rights that married couples and de-factos presently enjoy. In my opinion, the word marriage has been so devalued as to be worthless. It is not a state to which I aspire. As well, Marriage has been hi-jacked by religion and, as an atheist, I want no part in any union that is associated with supernatural beliefs.
I do not think my relationship is the ‘equal’ of marriage, because I know it is superior to the scores of marriages I have observed over the last 66 years. The only heterosexual couples I know with relationships as loving, equal, committed and secure as ours, are in de-facto relationships because they too have come to despise the institution of marriage. You say marriage confers respect – but it merely perpetuates role-playing. Husband and wife, dominant and passive. ’
If it takes the word marriage to make people respect me, then I don’t want their respect. I respect myself, and that is sufficient. All I want is equality before the law. What my relationship is called is irrelevant.
IsMise... once again we agree. The choice of the word gay for same-sex-oriented people was a deliberate attempt to discomfort Hets, who like to think of themselves as 'straight' while we are 'bent' 'queer' etc. Don't you think we deserve a pleasant word to describe us rather than foul terms such as poofters, faggots and so on by which we are traditionally known? It's also a sour reminder to us that most gays are not gay at all -- oppression and harassment are omnipresent, poisoning life and draining it of pleasure. When hets. stop using pejorative terms for us, we will no longer need to call ourselves 'gay'.

Sorry for the late reply.

CR,
while you are quite correct that the lifestyle of the 1950’s would not return if parental leave was stopped, but the point I was trying to convey is that we would be in danger of losing basic human rights if we’d erase parental leave. What people want today is a family-friendly society where the role of both the parents is recognised.

While I agree that the model has changed and there are far more self employed, and independent contractors, we need to think of the average workers which are still in the vast majority.

I don’t understand how caring for a family could be spurious and facile.
If employers are lagging behind with changes in our modern society, many parents will be unable to combine their work and parenting roles.
We need to take on these businesses rather than accepting that many parents are struggling.

There are benefits for the employers as well- they can hold on to valuable employees and save on turnover costs. We can see from some European countries that parental leave can be very flexible to suit both parents and their workplaces.

What I can’t grasp is why you would choose for a child to be put in a home rather than live with a same-sex couple! A stable family is much more beneficial for a child’s development than a home!

Jpw2040,
I wonder how big the role of schools is in the changing attitude of young people towards homosexuality.
I give their public school part of the credit for changing attitudes; I am happy about the way my children’s public school has put emphasis on anti-discrimination including homophobia.
I am not sure how conscientiously (religious) private schools are working at fighting discrimination on homosexuality- does anyone know?

Celivia, I know that most Australian schools from infants to university are hotbeds of homophobia. That one parent has found a school projecting positive attitudes is nothing short of miraculous. The greatest insult anyone can give in all schools, is to call someone gay, faggot, poof... and we know that half of all youth suicides are gay boys unable to cope with the homophobia they experience at school, home and in religious institutions from teachers, parents and other adults as well as their peers. Things are not getting better -- with the rise in religiosity among all politicians, things are deteriorating along with the gap between rich and poor.

ybgirp, one does not necessarily have to marry in church, my husband and I had a non-religious wedding. Even my parents rejected religion and didn’t marry in a church.
(I’ve recently discovered this atheist discussion website which I’m checking out, you might be interested in having a look.
http://www.the-brights.net/forums/forum/index.php?showforum=84
It’s free to join and you- and other OLO atheists- are welcome to send me a personal message there to say hello!)

Yes, it is extremely sad that homophobia is not dealt with in ALL schools and that it is a reason for boys to commit suicide while many of these suicides would be preventable if schools (and parents!) had a zero tolerance attitude towards homophobic behaviour.

I have no idea whether the public schools’ curriculum includes anti-discrimination topics or whether it was just a thing my kids’ school teachers developed voluntarily.
Perhaps you are correct and I was extremely lucky that these positive attitudes were introduced at the school.

It’s also sad that our politicians seem to promote Christian values rather than unbiased morality, human rights and values.
Do our ministers not see that if they don’t put money toward improving and updating education they will have to spend it on building more jails to lock up poorly educated juveniles and adults?

I would like to say more about private schools (like: get rid of them!) but perhaps this thread is not the place for it.

Yes, same-sex attracted young people are often perilously unprotected at school. A recent example was in a Queensland state high school, where a gay kid who was being threatened by other students was told to stay at home, punishing the victim rather than the perpetrator. http://www.news.com.au/couriermail/story/0,23739,20697973-3102,00.html (be sure to read the comments).

And yes, in most states, private schools enjoy exemptions from anti-discrimination laws, enabling them to disadvantage both staff and students who are gay.

From the NSW Attorney General's Department website: "Private educational institutions are allowed to discriminate against people because of their sex, marital status, homosexuality, transgender or disability. However, independent educational institutions are not allowed to discriminate against people because of their age or race. In addition, they must not allow or tolerate sexual harassment." http://www.lawlink.nsw.gov.au/lawlink/adb/ll_adb.nsf/pages/adb_general#areas

However there have also been some honourable instances of positive discrimination. About seven years ago, after a well-publicised case of a gay teenager being bullied in a state school, the boy was quietly placed in my niece's class at the local catholic high school, where he finished his schooling.

As a result I think it’s important to acknowledge that there are many fine people working to ensure that same-sex attracted kids aren’t disadvantaged in private schools. Some religious institutions actually do put compassion before dogma.