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The Forum > Article Comments > Too little time > Comments

Too little time : Comments

By Emma Simone, published 30/8/2006

Shared responsibility and equal parenting time should happen before relationships break down if there is to be any chance of it happening after.

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neither ALL the 'sofa-loafer' mothers, or ALL the 'dead-beat dads' are to blame. maybe the situation is just a part of the society that has evolved. women in general are not to blame for the way the family court system has been set up, and if it does benefit us more than the dads, we shouldnt have to feel guilty for it. i, for one, choose not to go that route to do what is best for my son, and am seeing more mothers switching on to the idea of shared parenting as being the best thing for their children. until the idea was brought to me by my ex, i hadnt given it any consideration, or seen it as an option, because i knew nothing about it. none of my friends were raised that way. none of my current friends have that arrangement for their children. here, at least, it is a new concept. that in itself is one reason it might be slow to get off the ground. people dont like change. if a woman seperating from her partner sees her future as children full-time, work part-time, every 2nd weekend to herself, it might be hard for her to see the benefits of shared parenting to start with. it was for me. it felt like i would be losing my son. but i wont be. i'll still be his mum & still be here for him. (we havent started shared parenting yet, it will start when my sons dad is ready for it - which isnt just yet)(thats from him). so, give these women someone to talk to about the situation, someone to show them that they are more than a mother, more than an 'ex', and that moving forward with their lives is the best thing for them, and their kids. and let the dads know someones on thier side, so they dont have to go to 'dads on air' to collectively woman-bash. one bitter woman is not representative of all women, as the wrong doings of one man do not make all men bastards
Posted by sugarbaby, Friday, 8 September 2006 9:25:55 PM
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p.s.something i thought of today -
the prices of real estate have gotten so high that anyone who wants to buy a family home has to spend alot more time at work (unless you are a high income earner). children are left at home with mum because dad earns more (in a lot of cases), or in childcare while both parents work. money becomes a huge stress for the parents, and cuts down on their enjoyment of the kids in the time they have with them. the relationship breaks down because the couple are too tired to communicate & feel like they are being drained physically & emotionally. is it becoming a choice between a happy family, or a family home? (and i really dont mean to generalise, i know families break down for all kinds of reasons)
Posted by sugarbaby, Friday, 8 September 2006 9:26:53 PM
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