Joli,
Your son sounds like a sweetheart, and I hope he preserves his sensitivity while still developing the "skin" we all have to have to survive in the world.
But I have to take issue with one of your comments, you appear to imply that if he meets a kind homosexual, he may be vulnerable to becoming one and I doubt you have anything to worry about on that score.
Plenty of people have homosexual experiences without becoming gay. Plenty of others know and like many homosexuals throughout their childhood without becoming gay. (Not, as they say, that there is anything wrong with being gay). My husband's father was gay, he raised four children ( 2 his own (yes, gays used to marry and have kids) and 2 stepsons). None of his 4 children are gay though they were well aware of their father's sexuality, it simply wasn't an issue for them. When they reached puberty, their thoughts and fantasies turned to the opposite sex, not because they chose them to, but because that was their natural orientation.
If your son eventually identifies as homosexual, it will not be because of who has met, but because of who he is. He will no more "choose" his sexuality than you "chose" yours, or my husband (or his father) chose theirs.

JustDan,
You have introduced the idea of a Christian based society as being the only society that condemns homosexuality as abnormal behaviour. Such a conclusion is not true, many societies have condemned such acts as destroying their society.

Are you claiming that the Muslim, Hindi and Chinese cultures all accept gay relationships as socially normal?

Quote, "So, ..name one successful society ...? ....... And if we look to the oldest current cultures I think your Christian sensabilities may be a little shaken to see that they are muslim (middle eastern), hindu (Indian) and let's not turn to the age of the Asian cultures, e.g. Chineese - can't see too many Christians there!."

Enag. You said that "If your son eventually identifies as homosexual, it will not be because of who has met, but because of who he is. He will no more "choose" his sexuality than you "chose" yours, or my husband (or his father) chose theirs".

You know what Enag, lets just agree to disagree on that one!

You talk about natural orientation. If a child is not in his natural orientation in society because that child is sensitive and different, then he/she will look for and attract and ultimately choose an orientation that feels less different and in which they feel protected, comfortable and safe. Sensitive or emotional boys and girls that don’t fit in can choose to be gay because it meets their emotional needs not necessarily because of their sexuality.

I believe that emotionally we are being neglected and that is causing a lot of the problems that we are seeing in our youth and in society.

I realy dont worry about whether any of my children will become gay. Que sera, sera. I just want them to be safe and feel happy and I would like them to enjoy their life and I hope that they move out of home by the time they are 25 as I have plans, we want to see the world!

With the greatest respect, Joli, who would 'choose' to be homosexual in such an overtly homophobic society as ours still apparently is?

Also, it's interesting that, after chastising another correspondent for mis-spelling your name, you do the same thing to enaj in your post above.

Malicious double standard or Freudian slip?

Jolanda (Joli),
Conclusion: According to enaj homosexuality is the result of a mutant genetic development. He accordingly has a genetic predospisition which he cannt deny or ignore. The fact is that specific gene should be eradicated from society, and it will, because they cannot breed. It can only be when they deny their predisposed sexual orientation (as identified by enaj) and be sexually disoriented by engaging in a normal hetrosexual relationship that he could reproduce according his own species. Genetic research maintains that NO SUCH GAY GENE EXISTS, so where is the authority to maintain a genetic predisposition exists. Enaj speaks nonsense not fact. The problem is emotional attachment not mutant genetic predisposition.

Posted by enaj, Thursday, June 23, 2005 1:53:01 PM Quote, "If your son eventually identifies as homosexual, it will not be because of who has met, but because of who he is. He will no more "choose" his sexuality than you "chose" yours, or my husband (or his father) chose theirs.

Philo,
No, I never stated or suggested that Christianity is the only society that condemns homosexuality, nor that the other’s were more successful as they did not (which they did – to varying degrees).

My point was in response to your statement that implied that any society that did not condemn homosexuality was the only one to be successful. Looking at all the known civilizations, no society has survived for any great length of time without change. And all have, until the ‘modern age’, condemned homosexuality. Now does this mean that as these societies condemned it and as they were failures, the condemnation was proof that the societies were wrong? I think not.

My point was that no civilization has survived without great change in all our history. I suggest, the point would be that to base a civilizations success on whether it condemned homosexuality or not is a false benchmark – much like I’d suggest that to base a civilizations success on it’s religion is also a false benchmark as the Moslem and Hindu cultures as old as, if not older than our Christian.

And just in case you choose a certain line, if you think our culture is any more successful than theirs, then I’d ask you to take a close look at certain vices as predominant in our society as theirs and in certain cases taken to extremes. E.g. drugs are imported to the largest Christian country in the world (the US) on demand – not pushed; the porn industry is primarily funded from – you guessed it, US funds. And I’m sure the UK and Australia (2 Christian-founded societies) are contributing healthily.

I don’t disagree with Christianity (I am one!) but I don’t negate the validity of another’s beliefs because they aren’t mine. I don’t have that hubris (I hope). As I stated, believe and be good… let the divine worry about whether it’s good enough – you will receive guidance if required. Which reminds me, you never considered the rest of my note...?

Peace... Tolerance... Faith...
JustDan