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The Forum > Article Comments > The gap between rape and consent > Comments

The gap between rape and consent : Comments

By Monika Kruesmann, published 9/3/2006

Just saying 'no', just doesn’t cut it.

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"Rape? Not exactly. Consensual sex? Not exactly."

I love that. Rape is used so casually these days. It can be used as a threat against men, holding them to ransom. This is especially the case when you here about convictions based on drunken state of the woman. If I went to sleep in a place where a rave is held, I certainly would not expect to be protected by a mystical shield of heavenly goodwill, where I'll wake up in the morning to find all my expensive electronics intact and not a scratch on my body. Nor would I talk smack while I'm drunk and expect nothing at all to happen to me and to be completely safe. If you talk smack to drunken thugs, put up or shut up, and take it on the chin, like a man. Another case of feminism driven by eternal victimhood.
Posted by Steel, Friday, 10 March 2006 4:48:00 PM
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And, of course, I'm NOT saying rape is acceptable under any circumstances. I'm talking about misconception and the victim mentality.
Posted by Steel, Friday, 10 March 2006 4:50:33 PM
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I believe you're absolutely correct Steel.

But I wonder if anyone noticed the coincidence of this article being published one day after International Women's Day (March 8th) on which this subject was pushed world wide in the world's media? There were literally hundreds of stories about the "shocking" and rampant rape of women on that day. And they're still popping up even now.

The rape issue is one of feminism's favourite attacks on men. The statistics, created from advocacy research - women's institutions and academies - try to create a rape hysteria in women and are highly questionable. Mostly the data are falsified and as Steel correctly points out that the term rape is defined so broadly these days that it can mean almost anything as indeed this article by Monika Kruesmann also tries to spin too.

About the most interesting event to emerge from the recent International Women's Rape-fest Day, was the announcement by Ms Tony Blair and his feminist-left cronies about a new £500,000 rape hysteria propaganda program to demonise and humiliate English men whilst corrupting laws to achieve a higher rape conviction rate -

Guardian
Government plans anti-rape campaign
£500,000 advertising drive aimed at young men.
http://www.guardian.co.uk/gender/story/0,,1725945,00.html

It is interesting to note that only about 5% of rape complaints in Britain result in a criminal conviction. So ask yourself what's going on in the other 95%! And we're talking about some 12,000 complaints a year.

It seems many must be very confused about what rape is.

But then, might I suggest, there are a lot of vexatious and frivolous false allegations made against men from a lot of women confused about just what rape really is. In fact, about 95%!
Posted by Maximus, Saturday, 11 March 2006 4:13:29 PM
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Maybe we instead of "NO means NO" we should instead be using "YES means YES" ie. assume the answer is no until you are absolutely sure that there is mutual and sober agreement.
Posted by sajo, Monday, 13 March 2006 7:55:35 AM
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"YES means YES" is all very well, but it does not protect a man from a woman who changes her mind after the act. If a marriage certificate does not constitute any sort of standing permission for sexual approaches it could be that we should try something that covers a shorter periods – something akin to rental lease perhaps. Say a 3 month agreement which upon expiry, reverts to a monthly agreement until a cessation notice (effective immediately) is given.

I can think of a couple of problems with this though. Any sexual aggression may be difficult to prove before the notice is registered with the local constabulary, and secondly, this approach does nothing to address the main gripe of this article - asking or gesturing more than once may constitute emotional pressure approaching that borderline rape.

One thing left then - witnessed legal agreements for each and every occasion (let’s call these consent credits) with “orders by consent” made by your local court for repeat violators. A consent credit could be obtained at your local convenience store as you purchase the condoms. Doing it without consent credits, or with, but not meeting expectations in some way, violates the consent credit. Get reported more than once, and you are a repeat violator. Your condom purchases just got very expensive for the next 12 months.

Women should probably get half of any commission rates of consent credits, since they are the ones granting consent.
Posted by Seeker, Monday, 13 March 2006 8:15:47 PM
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Ah, the Tyranny of Ambuguity... the backbone of a woman's manipulative power over man.

Agreed... NO means NO, except when a woman says she didnt really mean it. Of course that never happens and l am sure these words have already labelled me as a meesogeenasty man. Whatever.

Too complicated. Its easier to just avoid the initiation of sex and leave it up to the the woman. In which case she WILL get VERY dissapointed/angry over time at the unreal man in her midst. Par for the course.

Failing that, maybe men in general should start doing what USA lawyers have advised their wealthy male clients to do... have the woman sign a Consent to Sex Waiver. No ambiguity there brothers.

Now, if you want to be guaranteed sexual union, just ply her with gifts, deference, fawning, feed her insecurities, play head games (yours and hers) and generally do all the things that foster mutual disregard and eventual relationship failure.

The article reads like a typical manifesto... ALL CARE and NO RESPONSIBILITY.
Posted by trade215, Thursday, 16 March 2006 5:14:06 PM
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