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The Forum > Article Comments > Osama bin Laden: He's back ... > Comments

Osama bin Laden: He's back ... : Comments

By Brad Berner, published 31/1/2006

Brad Berner gives an explanation to the meaning of the latest announcement from Osama bin Laden and al-Qaida.

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"Ah Soh God of the Trogs"
After the chorus of the "Daisy Cutters" not all,but some of Bin Laden remained.A round,ugly rancid orfice,far more beautiful than his persona.
After his demise,The Supreme Consciousness decided that he should be given a Buddist mentor Ah Not,in order to improve his attitudes and tolerance towards others.
Living in the earth's bowels Ah Soh was feeling unimportant,so one day he sought the council of Ah Not.Speaking through a puckered coit made him difficult to understand at times.
Ah Soh; I'm depressed.
Ah Not; Why so?
Ah Not; No one has answered my mobile text messages for refuge and they did notlet me achieve my potential.
Ah Not; And what was that?
Ah Soh; To bring the west to my level.
Ah Not; To what avail?
Ah Soh; So Sodom Insane will think that I'm powerful.At his last party at Gomorah they were sniffing mustard gas,mailing anthrax and playing pin the isotope on the skippy.But no could remember what a good time they'd had.
Ah Not;They must have been very drunk?
Ah Soh; No.the stupid bastards all died.Even the Hindu Irish suicide bomber thought he was to be reincarnated.Sodom told him he could clone him and he wouldn't come back as an animal,but there wasn't enough DNA.
Ah Not;He must have been totally incinerated.
Ah Soh;No, there was never enough DNA.
Ah Not; Tell me ,how do you recruit these suicide bombers?
Ah Soh;Easy ,we just tell them that they can have 50 virgins.
Ah Not;Their sex drive must be very strong!
Ah Not; Who said anything about sex?Only look and touch.You can't have sex with them!
Ah Not;Why not?
Ah Soh;Well,they wouldn't be virgins anymore.It took eighty years to find that many!
Ah Not;Aren't they bit old?
Ah Soh; Oh no we froze them.
Ah Not; You mean to say that they're dead?
Ah Soh; Well,technically they're alive.Sodom's been experimenting and he'll have the DNA problem sorted out when he finds some smart scientists who enjoy suicide parties.
-continued
Posted by Arjay, Tuesday, 31 January 2006 7:02:12 PM
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Boaz-David

I think your opinion on the issue of Jerusalem quite correct. For an answer I think revisiting the establishment of the State of Israel should be a basis of any resolution. The West Bank of Jerusalem was a part of Palestine. In the modern history of warfare following a war I cannot recall an occupied territory being claimed by the victorious state not eventually being returned to the traditional owners. Can you think of any? (Is Hell's temperature falling?)

Hamas is posing two or three positions on many issues. That represents an internal struggle within Hamas between it's different factions. However it's election manifesto ommitted any reference to the destruction of Israel.
There was an excellent article in yesterdays New York Times on just the issues you raise. Concensus seems to suggest Hamas victory was due in large part to two factors. Neither had much to do with foreign policy.

The aid issue is a non issue. All parties understand all it's implications and the pragmatists on all sides will prevail.

Yes, we are at a crossroads in so many issues. The single biggest issue is violence. In this issue the Palestinians who have asked Hamas to lead may well find us all a sensible resolution. We must not forget they accepted the need for peace with Israel. That is something the corrupt Arafat and Fatah couldn't bring about. They'd reject bin Laden's approach and his fundamentalism. I think Hamas may well already done that, all indications are if they haven't, then they are certainly debating those issues.
Posted by keith, Tuesday, 31 January 2006 7:06:00 PM
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Greetings All.

Arjay, it's 72 Virgins that he (or she?) will get - if their life is given up in martyrdom.

But like my son asked - "what if the other 22 were the ugly ones...?"
Like all good martyrs of all good religions the profits were for the prophets when all was said and done.

Fanatic religious zealots (of all persuasions) must surely need counselling - just read some of the exploits of their deeds throughout the ages...scary stuff! Even JC himself was given to an outburst.

Does one persons freedom fighter beget another's terrorist? A quandary time itself has not answered. "Terrorist" per se has not been defined by even the majority of academics and terror experts to date.

Under the latest SEDITION Laws, if I were even vaguely to put Uncle Summer Bed Linen in a positive light, then my visit to the virgins would be on shaky grounds. We are losing by degrees, 'freedom of speech' - contrary to what the proponents for parliamentary democracy would have us believe. Guantanamo Bay is not a nice B&B.

I would love to venture an opinion (without having to take my Perception Management Pills) re: Osama, Al-qaeda, et al.
Does the fact that the CIA trained him, the fact he was effectively the reason assistance rendered by Taliban Resistance Fighters ousted the Soviets in Afghanistan (for the US government mind you) have any bearing on todays stance against him?

It could also happen here in Australia under not too vastly different circumstances. Alienate, disenfranchise, belittle, place 'kill orders' on various members of an organisation and see what begins to transpire. Read how the latest Terror Laws affect any person of 'Aboriginal/Indigenous descent'. Maybe the government knows something about the Aboriginal Nations they won't let the rest of us in on? Does charity start at home - who knows. Hamas in Palestine has a winner in that regard.

We are the so called 'Homo Sapiens' - the Thinking Mans Ape. We do not seem very sapient after all the years of blood spilled it seems.
Posted by Albie Manton in Darwin, Tuesday, 31 January 2006 7:51:36 PM
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"Ah Soh God of the Trogs"

Ah Not; Your allies the Taliban,they closed all the soccer fields.
Ah Soh; Well we didn't close them,we just ran out of players.
Ah Not; You executed them!
Ah Soh; Only for missing goals.
Ah Not ;Not even for an own goal?
Ah Soh;Ah, for that crime ,death would be a blessing.
Ah Not; Why did Omah order such practises?
Ah Soh; It focus the mind and Omah found that he could command a new level of respect.Besides the crowd loved it
Ah Not; Why?
Ah Soh ; Because it wasn't happening to them.
Ah Not; The Taliban really supressed the Afghan women.
Ah Soh; They're not supressed.
Ah Not; Well they can't work have no education aren't allowed on the street to beg, even when their men are dead.
Ah Not; What an ungreatful bunch of whingers.Don't they realise how well off they are.My Al Kyber forces are working their passes to the bone,so they can be free from the evil influences of the West.
Ah Not; Like what?
Ah Soh; There is too much thinking and self indulgence and not enough suffering.
Ah Not; What's wrong with enjoying a mortal life?
Ah Soh: It distracts people from important issues.
Ah Not; Like...
Ah Soh; Fear and confusion.
Ah Not:Why not give people freedom and prosperty through education?
Ah Soh; How can I control those who know who I am?Besides,peace requires too much effort.The formula is simple;poverty,victims, blame hate and religion to defy all reason equals jihad.
Ah Not; When all is destryed,what will you preside over.
Ah Soh; Nothing.But we will have won!
Ah Soh; Won what?
Ah Soh; The jihad against the infidels!
Ah Not; Who are they?
Ah Soh; People you can't trust.They are everywhere.Sodom can't even trust himself.
Ah Not; If everybody can't trust anybody,then somebody is in deep poo.
Ah Soh; You bet ya.That's why I'm a nobody hiding in a cave.

-To be continued.
Posted by Arjay, Tuesday, 31 January 2006 7:58:42 PM
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Hi all

Fellow_Human (post 10:43:59 AM 31/1/06)
A pity you've chosen the tact that you have. Leading members of your own faith have directed me towards certain readings. I was told to read an 'authorized' version of the Qur'an, more "hassan" than Dawood's, which I already possessed. The 'new' Qur'an was a present from a leading Muslim. Several former-Muslims have also given instruction beyond my own studies.
When an 'authorised' version of the Qur'an says, as a footnote to Surah 2:190, & I quote:
"Al-jihad (holy fighting) in Allah's Cause (with full force of numbers & weaponry) is given the utmost importance in Islam (& is one of the pillars on which it stands). By Jihad Islam is established. Allah's word is made superior. .... By abandoning Jihad (may Allah protect us from that) Islam is destroyed & the Muslims fall into an inferior position; ... Jihad is an obligatory duty in Islam of every Muslim, & he who tries to escape ... dies with one of the qualities of a hypocrite.
"Narrated Abdullah bin Mas'ud: I asked Allah's Messenger, 'O Allah's Messenger! What is the best deed?' He replied, 'To offer the Salat (prayers) at the early fixed stated times.' I asked, 'What is the next in goodness?' He replied. 'To be good & dutiful to your parents.' I further asked, 'What is next in goodness?' He replied, 'To participate in Jihad in Allah's Cause.' I did not ask Allah's Messenger anymore (questions) ..." 4 Hadith 41.
then, Jihad (fighting) is the 3rd most important task. It usurps zakat, the Ramadan & the Haj.
If you say that "telling lies" is the 4th greatest sin - from the 'official' list it's # 5 - then Muhammad committed the 4th greatest sin, & the Qur'an allows it under Surah 66:1-5. Further the Qur'an encourages others to also lie under Surah 16:106.

Peace. But at a cost. Holiness, righteousness & truth cannot be sacrificed just to get a truce.

Cheers all
Posted by LittleAgreeableBuddy, Tuesday, 31 January 2006 8:01:28 PM
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You won't ever get an honest answer from Muslims. Ask a straight forward question and the Jews will come up or a crazy Christian at an abortion clinic.

Lying is considered a very serious sin in Islam. However there are situations where lying is permissible. Eg A Sunni Muslim with the goal of achieving an Islamic State must lie - this would be a righteous act for Allah, not an immoral one.

There is an extremely negative attitude in Islam toward ridiculing Islam or Muslims, leaving Islam, or exerting any influence on Muslims which might influence them to leave Islam.

Under Sharia these could all be punished by death. A key verse in this context is Sura 2:217 which states that 'fitna' (testing/trial) is worse than killing.

We have to understand that we 'test' Muslims, with the truth admittedly. But culturally they cannot handle it.

Don't expect them to be able to use their scriptures to defend Islam. They are horrific. But in their mind, the great God, the mighty power can justifiably destroy his own creatures if they will not submit to Sharia. So Islam can justify itself no matter what it does.

They rely on ignorance, from us, and other Muslims to spread the religion.

One Christian who kills an abortion doctor is somehow the same as all Islamic terrorism? Do you usually compare things that way?

I'd like to borrow money from you.
Posted by Martin Ibn Warriq, Tuesday, 31 January 2006 8:22:21 PM
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